Wife will not stop cheating

Dear amai I hope I find you well. I am a married man and I am in a very unhappy relationship because of my wife’s infidelity. I am a father to four children. I work away from home and only used to visit during weekends. My wife took advantage of my absence and decided to have a boyfriend. Some time back I took a few days off and went home unannounced. I was shocked to find that the kids were left alone and she only returned home around midnight. We had a very bad fall out and I forcefully took her phone. What I saw was shocking to say the least. The nature of chats and nude pictures she was sharing with her boyfriend were very graphic. I called her tete and showed her what I had discovered. She was equally shocked and promised to take up the issue with my in-laws. I am legally married and my marriage is registered under 5.17. It has been four years now and tete never came back with an answer. I tried to persuade my wife to live a clean life but she still talks to her boyfriend and behaves wildly. I decided not to visit home. I have not seen my kids in the last 6 months. I now have a girlfriend who I want to marry and move on with despite the fact that I am not divorced. Does it matter? Amai please assist.
Response
I am very well and thanks for asking. Your story made my reading very sad, I am especially concerned about the welfare of the children. Your wife seems unrepentant, it is irrational for a mother of four to get involved in such an affair. Your marriage is already on the rocks, instead of seeking help to rectify it. Dating someone out of wedlock on your part only adds fire to the fuel. You are both wrong, a 5.17 union is supposed to be a monogamous. At this juncture, I think you must file for divorce and go your separate ways. Children have rights, go to a civil court and map a way forward for them. It is the first step to safeguard their welfare once you have concluded this unfortunate chapter with your wife. Both of you try to be responsible parents for the sake of your children.